B.Tech me?

Sorry everyone, for once again being so late to post....actually i was busy with some work and so down..that i didnt find my mind fine enuf to express...
Today, i am here to share with you a pice of my mind... as the title suggest..that is exactly what i feel now..B.Tech? Who me? Now whats that?
I got my degree results on the 20th of June , 2009. Managed a 8.18 DGPA.....for all non GPA ppl...thats 74.3%...sorry i forgot to mention... i hve graduated in electrical engineering....now dont ask me what is that.... i dont knw... thats wat is written on my provisional certificate....
That evening, one of my friends said..."so, now u r an engineer!" That was like a lightning strike 4 me.... never thought it that way... 'i am an engineer nw? wat is that? wat am i supposed 2 do?'...all this meant b--- s--- to me.. nothing else...its not that i say engineers r f------ but its that its a b--- s--- option for me..... i never wanted to b 1...so my friend sait "watevr..b it by choice or chance...u r 1 nw"..den i just remembered..it was neither by choice nor by chance....it was all but force n fear...i was forced 2 do it...n conceded cz i feared of the consequences that may rise otherwise....i lacked d guts to protest......was jst another mediocre gal....
this word...mediocrity,......it sux...................never was i d best in anything...but since 11th std..thats bck in 2003, this web of mediocrity engulfed me.....n ever since i didnt manage a way out..... perhaps i didnt try hard enuf.................now this mediocre life is slow poisoning me...n there 2 jus 2ways out......repair d way of life..n if its beyond repair..then end it.................but i guess d 2nd option again will b a mediocre's attitude n i am not going 2 continue as 1....
so i wud choose option 1.......................though i dont knw exactly hw 2 repair life right nw........but i hope i will come up wid ways 2 have a better life..............a step ahead of mediocrity if possible....